Monday, May 21, 2007

On Books and the Thrill of the Re-Org

I recently pulled all my books from their bookshelves and piled them high on the living room floor. It was the end of the semester and time to organize. For those who know me well, it is not news that organizing is one of my secret delights. I can get lost in it for hours, sorting and pondering and moving objects about in a very small circle of space until they are arranged just so. (A counselor might want to point out the OCD impulses of such a habit; I, on the other hand, consider it a harmless practice for a heart needing to pretend she can arrange the world.)

For this particular re-org, I decided my books would no longer be shelved topically as usual, but would be coordinated by the color of their spine (I must give credit to my friend Nathania for this inspiration). Besides the aesthetic delight of such a new arrangement, I was also starting to feel that my novels needed to mingle with the psychology textbooks; my British literature needed the company of the Russian storytellers; my philosophers needed to parley with the poets; and my Bibles certainly needed everyone.

I sat on my leopard print footstool late into the night and stared at spines, trying to determine the shades of the palette. Disheveled groupings of books began to emerge: tangerines, merlots, sea-foam greens, rugged goldens. It was not always easy, mind you. Some particularly subtle shades stumped me for a while, as I decided what spectrum they would join. Where to put the zesty tomato reds? With the merlots or the tangerines? These were the dilemmas I was facing.

Gradually, spine-by-spine, the new sections of the library were created like a painted canvass. I am thankful for the tangerines because they give needed spunk; the merlots are sort of a mature, regal presence; the blues are few but captivating; and the strong showing of blacks and charcoals seems to ground the piece. But beyond the appeal of lovely colors, it gives me great pleasure that my books have journeyed beyond the narrow confines of a Dewey Decimal style assortment. Sometimes when Locke only talks to Rousseau, he begins to forget that Dostoevsky might have something to contribute to his discussion of freedom. Or when the Gospels are not in dialogue with Siddhartha, something gets lost.

When my books are segregated by mere subject, I suspect they have a bent to be pretentious: holding long-winded conversations with similarly minded books using the same worn out lexicon and assumptions. William James was supposed to have said that some people think they are thinking when really they are just re-arranging their prejudices. It seems one has to be quite intentional to avoid this trap of the narrow-minded pursuit. Hopefully, my books as they mingle will inspire my mind to do likewise.

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

In a nutshell

At the risk of being narcissistic (can a blog by its very nature ever avoid such a fate?), I thought I would just give a little update into what my life is about these days. Here’s a short list of my life projects as the summer unfolds:

Writing: I am still doing nearly as much creative writing as school writing, but I have waned in my gumption to submit work to editors. So, this summer I need to return to risk-taking and start tracking down magazines. I am currently working on 2 pieces that deal with faith and feminism (one should go up soon on BurnsideWritersCollective.com; the other is part of an anthology and seeking a publisher). I am also obsessively revising an article on Christianity and homosexuality, which my dear friend Andy and I are co-authoring.

In my attempts to pretend I am a real writer, I am also taking my “Second Annual Writers’ Weekend” trip up to the San Juan Islands. This year I plan to not go solo, but take my friends Penny and Lisa; the three of us have been meeting every Thursday morning for many months and working on our writing projects side by side.

School: This summer I am taking only 3 classes, which is a nice, moderate load. I am taking an Old Testament class (actually by the same prof I had in college), but I look forward to grappling again with issues of religion, violence, and gender that seem to always emerge in those ancient Mesopotamian texts. In addition, I am taking a class on sexuality, intimacy, and power. Finally, I am attempting independent research for the first time, which will involve researching how literature can be a tool to teach psychology. I hope to conduct a focus group with practicing therapists where I actually teach excerpts from poems and novels and discuss their relevance in the therapeutic realm.

Work: (Or, how I intend to pay my rent): This is still a bit of an interesting question☺. I have a handful of ESL students (from 7-year olds to adults), but I am hoping to market myself more at UW and get connected with graduate students writing interesting dissertations. I have noticed that ever since I quit my “real job” last August and opened my own tutoring business, I have slowly began to regress again in my vocational dreams. It is time to re-evaluate and dream of how I want to shape my business.

Play: Of course, writing and school is also play for me, but beyond that, I hope the summer is filled with: glorious games of beach volleyball; happy hours with friends; visiting my family in Spokane; lounging on the dock at the lake cabin; twirling on and off the dance floor; preparing for my sister’s wedding; Greenlake runs; and personal retreat/prayer days once a month up at Rosary Heights (a beautiful Catholic retreat center right on the water in Edmonds).

There you have it, my life in a nutshell.